Brace Yourself!

Holy crap, it’s getting cold. An Arctic blast has brought icy winds and temperatures in single digits. It’s almost like winter’s coming or something. I’ve had to pull out my thick winter duvet and search through my cupboards for warm jackets and trousers. They don’t get a lot of use in Brisbane. Winter here usually runs for a few days somewhere between June and August. You wake up freezing one day and think “Aah, it’s winter today”, and then search madly for your “winter clothing” that’s hidden under all the singlets, sarongs and beach towels.

The forecast for the next week is a few beautiful, fresh, sunny autumn days followed by rain, just in time for my birthday on the 17th. Of my almost 45 birthdays, It has rained on nearly every one of them. It became a joke. So many birthday plans were cancelled due to it.

There was one time when the family had planned to go camping at the beach for my birthday. It was bucketing down with rain so the plans were cancelled but I, ever the stubborn Taurus, would not accept this and insisted we go. When I say insisted, there was probably tears, snot and wailing. So, my poor parents packed the kombi and did the 60 minute drive to the coast where we sat in the car park looking out at the rain that was so heavy, we couldn’t see the beach. At this point I acknowledged that it was too wet to get out of the kombi let alone pitch a tent. So we drove home.

Despite the rain, as a child, I always loved my birthday. Who doesn’t love a chance to be the centre of attention! We had big birthday parties with loads of guests. Growing up in the country and going to a small country school, we were part of a close-knit community that connected through the school. Birthday parties were more than just the kids getting together. Whole families came and we partied all day and sometimes into the night.

We played party games outside between showers or even in the rain if it was just drizzling. One game we played was passing multiple water filled balloons around a circle and if the balloon burst when it was in your hands, you were out. The winner being the last one standing with an unburst balloon. It was a perfect game for rainy weather.

My particular favourite was a game called “rag bag”. It’s like pass the parcel but instead of a wrapped up parcel, you pass around a bag full of random pieces of clothing e.g. my Dad’s old rugby socks, bras (yes, bras) bought from op shops that we had in our dressup box, shawls, hippy dresses, hippy tights, hats – lots of hats. You pass the bag around as the music plays and when it stops, whoever is holding the bag has to pull out a piece of clothing and put it on. It wasn’t about winning or losing, it was about fun, and we had lots.

My birthday excitement has lessened as I’ve gotten older. It’s nothing to do with the ageing – I’m ok with that. I think it’s more that adult things started getting in the way. For one, you have to organise your own parties. The memories of childhood parties are strong, and I love the idea of a house full of my friends, having fun, drinking and laughing; trying to revive that childhood feeling of fun and connection. But I’m no longer in that same tight knit community, I have fewer friends and adult Christie is an introvert who doesn’t want her house full of people who won’t leave, touching her precious things and vomiting on her dog (ok, that was me, and I was 14, but still…).

I’ve tried to organise parties as an adult but my smaller friend base means that only about 3 people turn up. And I’ve discovered that I’m actually a terrible host. At one birthday get together, where I made the three guests wear hats (they’re lucky I didn’t make them wear my bras), I forgot to feed them. I got caught up in the chatting, drinking and talking shit and food slipped my mind. I don’t eat when I drink alcohol so I was fine, but my guests were starving with only hats to eat.

The last few years have been shitty birthdays. 2 years ago, we’d only just farewelled Peppa and celebrating was the furthest thing from my mind. Last year, we moved house on the day after my birthday, so the actual day was spent doing last minute packing and getting things ready for the movers. We have to move again this year (FARK!). Our lease ends the day before my birthday and the owners aren’t renewing as they’re moving their parents into the house. They’ve offered periodic leases until the end of August so at least I won’t have to be moving on my birthday again.

As a birthday treat, I’ve bought myself tickets to the Brisbane Writers Festival and I’m going to stay at a hotel in the city. I’ve finally realised that instead of organising a stressful house party, I can go out and do something to celebrate. Even if I have no one to do it with, in fact sometimes that’s preferrable.

I’m going to do a bit of writing during the festival with some reviews and feedback on the accessibility of the various places and events I attend. My NDIS funding has opened up my ability to access the community more easily and there’s so much I’d like to do. Disabled access is better than it was 10-20 years ago but it can still be varied and you don’t always know what a place is like until you get there. Getting out and seeing what is and isn’t accessible and talking about it here is a good way to start the conversation with event holders and let other people with disabilities know what to expect at events and venues.

I’m looking forward to my little break. Life’s pretty stressful at the moment and it will be nice to immerse myself in literature, writing, art and many other such things that energise and fulfil me. It’s important amid all the noise of pandemic recovery, cost of living increases, budgets and the housing crisis to take time out to do things that revitalise you.